19 November 2007

Out of Touch

Hey guys! How's it going? This month sure isn't getting any less crazy as it goes along. Everyone's NaBloPoMo-ing, GoBloMeMoFo-ing, or NaNoWriMo-ing. I'm not sure how much more I can take!

I feel like I've become disconnected, like the parts of my life that were held together by blogging are slowly beginning to unravel. I really love blogging, I love that my friends who live far away can read about what Steve and the girls and I have been up to, and I love the little community of people that I have found here on the interwebs, but lately I find myself at a loss for words. This not normal for me (just ask Steve) and it leaves me feeling like I'm standing in front of a crowd of people, not knowing where to put my hands.

Megan wrote a post a couple of weeks ago about writing her blog and why she does it and how she does it and it got me thinking. I know why I read the blogs that I read, but lately it feels like I can't remember why I write this blog. The reason's there, I'm sure of it, I just can't quite put my finger on it.

Do I write just for me? Well, not really. It's hard for me to do that knowing that you all are out there. Do I write for you then? Well no, it's not that simple. Do I write to prove to the world how clever and witty and self-effacing I can be? Um, sometimes, but I don't really like that part of myself, so forget I said that please.

When I'm not doing one of a million other things, I find myself hovering, silently willing my children to do something funny so that I can blog about it. But then, when something presents itself, I talk myself out of writing about it. The mundanity of my life is staggering sometimes - even to me, do I really need to share it with the world?

I'm just not sure I know what I'm doing anymore. But I'm an optimist - so I'm going to take a wee little break and when I come back, I will be refreshed, renewed and know what the fuck I'm doing, okay?

Besides, I could really use the time to finish up the old novel for that whole NaNoWriMo thing, so, have a great Thanksgiving (or Thursday, depending on your country) and I'll see you when the noveling/thinking dust settles.


Lilacspecs said...

Hang in there and good luck on the novel!

Heather, Queen of Shake-Shake said...

I'm not sure what I'm doing anymore. Or even why I'm doing the blog thing.

I need a break too. Too many changes that I have to adjust to right now. And I'm cranky right now too. blogging just feels like one more d*mn thing I gotta do.

I think Thanksgiving is a good excuse for another 4 day weekend so close together! And employing my "marked as read" button will be a good thing too. Because 200 new posts just over the weekend? Ack! That Noblohowhatever must end!

andi said...

I miss you already. But of course, I totally understand. I've been posted a lot less lately because I've been overwhelmed with the mundane or just trying to enjoy the spectacular when it happens instead of planning how I'm going to write about it.

Maureen said...

Have a great Thanksgiving too... it's just plain ol' Thursday for Canuck me.

Blogging should be fun, so if it isn't, give yourself a break and step away. You'll be inspired again before you know it. In the meantime, I'll miss you!

Amy said...

Go let your dust settle. I'll watch for you to pop up again in my reader!

Cathy said...

I know what you mean. Exactly. (But I hope you return soon.)

Jessica @ A Bushel and a Peck said...

I will seriously miss you while you're gone, and I hope you come back soon. I think I write my blog for the challenge of recreating the moments that make up my often-boring life into something more interesting, and for the community. I love the sense of belonging to something bigger. Good luck on the novel and I hope you're back to the blog sooner rather than later! Happy Thanksgiving!

Stepherz said...

I think we all can relate. I'll miss you but maybe the holidays will inspire something fun and witty for you. Hugs!

Blue Momma said...

Enjoy your break. I think I need one, too. Or more precisely, I need more balance between my "blog life" and my "real life".

But you? I'll miss you while you're gone!

Suburban Oblivion said...

I'm over this whole November writig stuff. It sucks.

mrs. mustard said...

I find that I go through spurts of really wanting to write, and do, followed by total ambivalence toward it.
I just take it as it comes, and don't let it get the best of me. Gotta save that for my IRL family and friends.