22 May 2008

Repeating the words will make them true.

Thank you all so much, both for your kind words of encouragement and for all of the helpful suggestions for preparing the house for renters. I have a tendency (as you may have noticed) to feel like I have to do everything and do it all perfectly and in five minutes. I try to stop and breathe, but sometimes I forget.

It's going to be fine.

I got an email from TurboTax letting me know that since I had them deduct their fees from my refund, my ill-gotten rebate check will be here six weeks later than it would have if I had paid them upfront. Why? They didn't say. Also, when saving money for a move, it would have been nice to start from the good side of zero.

It's going to be fine.

Last night (while Steve was stuck in NYC eating an amazing free meal at this restaurant) my youngest brother and his girlfriend, Bonnie, hung out with the girls. The best part? Bonnie is going to come twice a week and watch the girls during the gap between when I have to leave for work and when Steve gets home. And she rocks! They made pizza, played duck-duck-goose and freeze tag, and when I got home they were fast asleep. Who could ask for anything more?

Everything's going to be fine.

This is what happens, things pile on until the top of the stack is waving in the breeze above my head. I can see it - I want to reach up, steady it, steady myself, but the wind pulls my hand away.

My attention is drawn now to something else, to the world all around me and I want everything to stop, just for a second, just so I can reorganize my pile - moving some of the heavy things to the bottom would help I think - but of course it doesn't.

And when the pieces begin to fall I can only hope that they - and I - kind of sort of know what we're doing and that they will fall in the right places, at the right time, and that I will not fall while I am holding my pile of things.

Everything's going to be fine.


Misty said...

Well... Keep hanging in there. Some of these things sound great... Others will get there... *sigh*

andi said...

It really will be fine. Things will fall into place soon. Really...