10 October 2007

Dear Ronnie,

Dear Ronnie,

I understand why you couldn't hire me back in June, but several things have changed since then and I'd like the chance to reapply for the position, if it's still available.

For one thing, I want you to know that I have given your claim that I was "not ready to commit myself to excellence" a lot of thought, and I think that I am ready now. I have been thinking a lot about graduate school lately, and while I like the idea of being in school and also the idea of being done with school, I'm not sure I can handle applying to schools. The fact that my shoulders have been in knots since I started researching programs seems to be a sign that my commitment to excellence is better suited to a fast-food chain than a university.

I think what I find the most attractive right now about the prospect of working for you is the total lack of choices that I will be required to make. You have already committed the company policies to memory (oh don't deny it, I know you have) and will not hesitate to let me know if I am not following protocol or if I make some kind of fatal error when folding those little cardboard thingies that the fries come in (and yes, I'm sure they do have a name, but now is not the time for nit-picking).

When choosing a graduate program there are far too many things to consider and no guide book with which to navigate. I need to find a program that works for me, okay. But then I also have to make sure that the location of the program works for my family, and that I can get the financial assistance I will need, that we can afford to live close to the university, that Steve will be able to find work and that I meet all of the requirements for application. I have to figure out when the deadline is and whether they will need to be sent the scores of my upcoming GRE Literature exam. I need to write down how much the application fee is and make sure that I send out requests for letters of recommendation in plenty of time to get them back by the deadline.

You don't require letters of recommendation, do you, Ronnie? That's what I love about you - all I have to do is show up on time and do exactly as you say and you will love me. (No, not like that!) My obligation to you will be minimal - I will not stay up nights trying to figure out when all of this grad school research will actually happen and if I can squeeze it in before March.

In short, please accept this letter as a request for employment. I am available immediately, lack of childcare will not be a problem, I'm pretty sure Matilda can hold down the fort for the duration of my ten hour shift, I mean, she's five, it's about time she learned that I can't always be there for her.



p.s. Veronica wants her CD back, she says you know which one.


Kristi said...

Mmmmmm....and think of all the fries you'd get. Yummmmmy.

Queen of Shake-Shake said...

Can we get hired together?

I think of finishing my Masters. Then I get skeered by all of the stuff I would have to do to even possibly, maybe, get in. THEN there's the actual school work. Ugh.

andi said...

Matilda could totally handle that. I keep saying that it's about time our kids start doing something useful.