INT. OUR HOUSE - EVENING, AROUND 5*
me: Oh there you are, I thought you guys were done at 3:30.
him: We went out for a beer. It's what you do after conference thingies.
me: Oh is it? Hmm, I had a conference with Freya today, we didn't go have a beer after.
him: You didn't?
me: No, I didn't realize that was what you people did, you people who don't work at the same place where you live. Is that what you do?
him: You know, it would be nice to come home to hi, I missed you, how was your day, sometimes.
me: Oh, would it? Dinner on the table, whiskey on the rocks, me in some heels?
him: You know what I mean.
me: Oh, I'm sorry, is being greeted by my naked desperation on a daily basis getting to you darling? Because if it is... well... you might just have to deal.
him: I'm being kind of serious.
me: Me too. It ain't easy you know.
him: I know. I'd stay home if I could.
me: I know. I'll try to tone down the desperation once in a while. Like maybe I can just bare my desperation every other day or something...
him. Or alternate Thursdays.
me: Don't push your luck.
*disclosure: these things were spoken in the loving spirit of jest - the kind that comes with an edge - and also they are paraphrased. I'm working on the photographic memory, but it's not going very well.
8 comments:
Ha ha! Time for Mommy to escape and leave the reigns in Daddy's hands for just one day, one whole day. Let's see how naked his desperation gets ;)
I know this conversation well, except we both have the naked desperation going on in our house (because he stays home 2x a week, and because I breastfeed).
Jest with an edge.
I know exactly what that is.
I have had this very conversation. It's thinly veiled in humor, but the truth is in there.
Did you put a bug in our house? Are our phone lines crossed? Seriously...
Ack...I know this conversation personally.
Hey Nell, after you do school pick up, feel free to have a beer once you get home. Do you have a bar in your kitchen? Because if you use your imagination....
And just because I want to share some Mike Rowe google pervs with you, I just typed his name. Now you too will get hits for Mike Rowe Naked. Enjoy!
That whole "I'd stay home if I could" thing is such a load of sh*t. Jay gave me that with child #1, but doesn't even try to say it with #2. We both know he'd go insane.
We also joke about these things (usually it involves one of us saying as we're leaving - "See you later - if you're lucky"). Do you think our children will be forever scarred with our joking about abandoning them? Ah, well. Dark humor is all that keeps me going some days.
I don't even hold on to my desperation until he gets home. I call him starting around lunchtime and beg him to come home. I cry and everything.
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